I Live for God. God Lives in me.

I am in the cafeteria, drinking a cup of still hot chocolate. My elbows are resting on the table, both hands holding my head to prevent it from falling straight on the table because of sleepiness. I am waiting for my best friend. She’s taking her last exam for this day, I finished mine earlier. I’m really bored and tired. We are supposed to go home together, that’s why I’m waiting for her, here in the cafeteria. It’s already 3 in the afternoon. The cafeteria is less busy than it used to be every morning until after lunch. There are few students occupying other tables but they also seem tired and just wanted to take some rest and eat before going home. Even the canteen sellers and personnel seem exhausted and just waiting for this day to end. Strong winds made my long black hair sway. I can smell the food, the fruit shake, and even the scent of the girl’s strong perfume sitting in the nearest table. But it’s the smell of the hot chocolate that filled my senses… My eyes capture...

Last August 4, 2012, I celebrated my 18 th Birthday, 2 days advance to its actual date. It was really special. It’s not that much because every preparation for that special day was all by our own efforts and just the help of all the very special people in my life. We never paid for services from other people like catering, event organizer, sounds and lights etc. In fact, I really felt that the efforts from these closest people to me are the very same reason why my birthday is extra more special. We started preparing for these a month before the date. Actually I myself, never really exerted so much effort for the preparations, aside from of course, what color would I like to use, what will I wear and who are the friends I’m going to include to the 18’s. I want to express so much of my gratitude to my ever supportive mother and sister and of course my father, who gave all their efforts in the preparations and helped me decide on things I’ve had a hard time deciding. All their ...

Lagi man kitang isipin Ika’y di mapapasakin. Kaya kahit panaginip Ikaw sana’y makapiling.

Love is a decision Set by mind, ruled by heart. But whatever it is, Both, stay in one body, Controlled only, by YOU… 

Ako ay ako Siya ay siya Ako’y hindi siya,  siya’y hindi ako Kami ay magkaiba. Ngunit sa isang banda, Ako ay siya At siya ay ako, Kami ay iisa.

This is for those people who knew how to love and how to be in pain. This is for those people who were left hanging and those who learned to spread their wings to fly. This is for those people who experienced the birth of love deep within themselves and eventually experienced its death. Yes, no matter how crazy or weird I am, I know exactly how it felt to be left alone in love. Just so you know, this experience had taken a lot of strength and courage from me that I had to ask for donations from my friends.  If you had experienced it already, congratulations because I know you passed the test with high scores (I just know).  I felt it and I understand that it is not easy. No matter what type of situation you were in, it’s just the same, you’ve been hurt because of the greatest feeling of the world, LOVE. While everyone is so happy about loving someone, while everyone is patiently waiting for their true love with high hopes, there you are, despairing, regretting that you...

March 23, 2011 My lips are smiling But my head is aching. My face looks happy But my heart is empty. Yes my heart is not broken anymore, But it is EMPTY. And emptiness is killing my heart.

I forgave you not because the pain is gone. I forgave not because I don’t care anymore. I forgave you because… I still love you and I still care for you. Maybe I’ll just love you this way now. And then maybe as days go by, I’ll forget that you hurt me. And hopefully forget that I love you too. It is because I know you cannot love me anymore the way that I love you now. And so I’ll just pray and wait for that day That I forget everything even my love for you.   February 2011